I’ve been trying to have inspiring or otherwise informative posts so far, but I do think it’s important to offer the contrasting side of the reality that is my walk. I’d like to think it’s still inspiring in it’s own way, but there’s certainly less bravado involved.
This walk is really quite lonely. Which feels almost strange to say, because I still feel like I’m at home here. My stay hasn’t been long but I’ve already made a few great friends. But it’s like I’m stuck in a limbo of sorts where I greatly appreciate my new friends but still feel like I’m also 1300 miles from them. That being the distance from my location to my home town, so you don’t have to look anything up.
I was so eager to leave the life I wasn’t content with behind that I practically ran out the front door to begin my adventure. I had drifted away from many of my friends by the time I decided to cross America, so I didn’t really think much of just picking up and going. Now I find myself longing for home more than I anticipated.
Not more than I want to do this walk, however. Confronting this reality is too important to leave just because my heart isn’t getting the constant warm-fuzzies of beautiful landscapes and birds eating seed from my outstretched hand. Or because the adversity I’m facing isn’t a literal physical obstacle like a multi-mile incline or a scorching hot day.
Most of the problems I am to face will be/internal. Loneliness on long stretches of walking. Powering through the mental toll it will take as I get tired on the road but must press on for whatever reason. The general lack of security that comes with living essentially homelessly. It all takes it’s toll, but I know I’ll be better for making it through the struggles I’m enduring. It would be more harmful for me to quit than to carry on, so this will be seen through to the end so long as I am physically capable.